These have been stored in my phone's notes for some time and I think it is time I publish these thoughts here.
August 2016
I feel terrible that I am not happy for you.
In the past I would share the happiness and like everyone else I waited for you to make the big announcement, that you will be tying the knot with the special person. But this time round it's different.
This time, the feeling is all but happy. There's an unsettling feeling that I find hard to explain. Like there's no sincerity. Each time there's new updates I kept brushing them aside as I'm very confident that it's just some rumours which would eventually dies off. You're afterall the most eligible bachelor and everyone can't wait to see you settle down and the lucky one that you finally choose to spend the rest of your life together.
Like the line out of Maine Pyaar Kiya, I too feel like I love you too much that it hurts. It's weird to think I would feel such way seeing that we have never met, never cross path and never saw each other in person before.
So how do I explain this feeling? Obsessed? I do not think so. As much as I love you I believe I still stand firm on reality ground that you are there and I am here and it's near impossible that we would meet and fall in love and be married to each other. So definitely I'm very much still sane and sound as I might sound crazily and madly in love with you.
All I want is for you to be happy. I've seen you over the years and I very much wish that you be happy always because you deserve it. I love seeing you smiling laughing be happy whenever you are around children. It's like you're smiling from your eyes and it's all coming straight from your heart.
Being the sane person I am, I'm sure there will be one day finally when you do decide to get married and have your own family. I wish nothing but the best for you.
I'm not sure how it'll be when you are finally someone's husband. But you'll still be the same person I have always known you as. I doubt anything would change once you're married. I believe I will continue to love you as my love for you didn't just grow over the night but rather it grow over the years and it just gets stronger day by day.
To me, you'll always be my first love and I'll always have you in a special place in my heart.
Love forever and always. Kyun ki tu hai mere pehla pehla pyaar hain.
December 2016
Never met you but from the way I speak of you, it seems like we've known each other for long. I call you Salman, not Salman Khan.
I admire how you are not shaken by all the hateful and hurtful words and choose to keep quiet. Yet you make your voice heard when you feel that it's needed.
It hurts sometimes when I see people mocking you. But I have since come to term that as much as there's people like me who love you, there'll be people who hate you too for whatever reason they might have. It's better to focus on the good things because why should I waste energy to feed the negativity?
It's impossible to make everyone like or love you but I know I'll continue liking you and loving you as long as I could.
Seeing you smile and laugh melts my heart. Seeing you in pain breaks them and I just felt like giving you a warm hug. So please smile and laugh more!
I've had people telling me I'm crazy for being so obsessed with you. I've had people questioning why I choose to like someone like you, when there are plenty of othet better men around.
I can't answer them and desribe to them exactly why I fell in lovewith you. But I try to when I see them trying to understand this whole pagalpan
I don't know when this love will last. Hopefully forever and always, for as long as I could.
Salman, my no. 1 favourite man.
No comments:
Post a Comment